I'm sitting here, cramming for tests and assignments that feel like they determine everything about my future and who I am. I'm sitting here wishing I had more knowledge, talent, and control. This has been what's going on almost every day of junior year.
Suddenly, I remember that there are people who wonder how they're going to live their life without an education/support system/opportunities. Without someone to love them. Without money, food, water, or shelter. Without advice, encouragement, or support. WITH cancer, Alzheimer's, autism, ALS, and other disabilities. With abusive environments. With worlds of fear, hopelessness, and suffering. There are people wondering how they're going to live the next 6 months because that's all they have. There are people wondering whether or not they'll see their loved ones again. The ocean again. Their home again. Whether or not they'll see another day. And it breaks God's heart that I'm lounging in paradise wishing I had more.
What am I choosing to dwell in?
What are we meant to feel? To do in this world?
Lord, please continue to break me.
Lord, thank You. Thank You. Thank You.
"Cos my comfort would prefer for me to be numb
An avoid the impending birth of who I was born to become"
"C.S. Lewis Song"-Brooke Fraser
(Bitter)sweet Awakening.
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